I’ll tell you why mom burns the eggs
Why the pancakes are a little too brown,
Why muffins are toasty
and the toast tastes like charcoal
and the meat like it’s been on the ground.
WELL-
I’ll crack the eggs when the pan’s just right
I’ll drop them in and watch
They’ll sizzle a little slightly turn white
And then I’ll here “MOM!”
Hang on I say
- “MOM!”
- just a minute,
- “MOM!”
Then another slightly smaller, more shrill
- “MOMMY”
to which “coming”, I say,
As I take out the dvd,
-clean it,
-wipe up the floor
Leave it dry,
catch your sister and
take the scissors away…
The eggs are burning!
Just in time to stir out the brown
and hope that you don’t see
I lay down the bacon pop in the toast
and try to find something for me.
Moms have to eat too you know.
And I peel the fruit and get a bowl and turn the bacon round
Then I hear a scream, then a crash and plop dropping everything on the ground
“so much for eating…”
Running to the bedroom
your lying on the floor
Cause you stubbed your toe
and you just don’t know
If you can walk anymore.
Are you kidding?
The bacon!
Just in time to put out the fire I salvage a piece or two
As smoke fills the room I have the pleasure of hearing this comment from you…
“MOM, What’s burning?”
“Nothing”, I say flatly
as I hear the toast pop up,
And I notice someone’s cleverly
managed to slide the level up
“Black toast….
Hmm…, Maybe a little jelly… some butter…
…I’ll eat it.”
Another round later I smile to myself
as I set the fresh toast down
then the napkins and bacon all the while I’m shaking
Happy the bread is a light golden brown
I wipe sis’s face free of marker
Get play-do out of her hair
scrape all the glue from off of my shoe
and find you a pair of clean underwear.
Now the table’s set
All I have to get
is some milk
And silverware too
Find your sister
change her diaper
And get your back pack too.
“Dig in.” I say.
“I wanted pancakes”!
“Where is the butter?”
“I need a knife and a napkin too!”
“Knife your left,
It already has butter
and the napkins are in front of you”
“now EAT!”
“MOM…”
“Yes?”
“Why are the eggs burnt?”
“Are you kidding?”
By the way-
I don’t like my eggs burnt either
Charcoal tasting toast make me ill
And if the muffins stick to the pan
It’s cause I’m probably off cleaning a spill.
When the meat is dry or the pancakes runny it’s not ‘cause I like waste
Or because your mean old mommy wants to force your delicate tastes.
See your homework’s checked and slips are signed
And your teeth are healthy and white
And you’re very smart and you’ll also find
You’ve a cozy bed to sleep in tonight.
‘Cause I’m thinking of work and your ball games
And even your wedding bells too
Your tuition and dances and all of the chances
that I want to give to you,
When I’m burning the eggs and the toast is too toasty
and the bacons a little too brown.
Here’s a thought-
If you keep your self busy without breaking your neck
And your nice to your sister too
And you manage to not burn the house down
There are other things I can do too.
I can time the toast and watch the eggs
Fold the clothes and make my bed
Dress myself and fix my face
Fix myself a meal I like instead.
Of not….
and your bacon your toast
the muffins the pancakes, the meat and the biscuits too
the eggs and all of a moms other jobs
might be perfect
-just like you.
